Jump Started and Off We Go

I am back in the swing of things. By the end of the last night I had the bathroom cleaned and mopped, the kitchen back in business and mopped with even a dinner made and ready by 3:30, the house vacumed, the dog room clean, wiped down, new bedding in their kennels, and even the long awaited fridge move from the garage into its new home. Oh, and did I mention the boys room was also cleaned up, and a few loads of laundry done and the entire front yard was free of weeds. Man the things you can do when you have your body back.

The crazy thing is the ship needs waxed and cleaned everyday without break. I think my sister has the idea. She cleans tip-top shape in the morning and off they go never to return until the evening hours and whamie you have a house that stayed clean all day. My problem is I don't have the money she does to keep up with all that fun while out and food to keep smiles on their faces. But it sure sounds good.

I have been so excited lately finding myself thinking is this real, am I really going to be mommy to someone I have always wanted to be mommy to. I then find myself say "yes this is real and you will soon be able to love, hold, kiss, and teach the beautiful things of life to". It is so amazing that you can find yourself loving this child(ren) who you know nothing about, and have so many natural feelings of parenting for. I have thought about their mother many times and the love & respect I have for her, and the hard choice that she had to make. I think about the day when I get to meet her for the first time (in this life or the next) and what I will say to her or what I will do when I see her. I can only imagine wrapping my arms around her and saying thank you, and telling her that they are still part of her life. As a mommy who has lost a child & not by choice. I could not imagine that not being a very tender moment and that you would still have that longing in your heart for that child. What I mean when I say "by choice" for them it could simple mean not having the means to care for a child(ren), and at that point having no option but to simply love that child more than you love yourself and placing them with an agency; or knowing that she was sick and would not make it much longer. As Blaine has said many times "not one of these little ones have come to this point without tragedy happening in their life first". This is so true and I simply hope and pray that we will be able to add a ray of sunshine & lots of love to their lives as they have ours.